August

It has been sometimes since my last update. I wanted to post something as there're always insights / thoughts coming into my mind. But those are coming in rapidly until I couldn't capture it into words. Spending too much time on reflection but end up getting nothing. It is either I refuse to go into my deeper thoughts / inner voice, or I get distracted by others. Time is so limited for me. Perhaps it is just an excuse.

I just want to type anything that came into my mind quickly before I lost it. Hence, the sentences might not be so relevant after one another.

Before I forget, I would like to take this opportunity to, firstly, thank someone. Not sure why but I think of this person recently, and really want to say thank you. Just a simple thank you. To whom, to the person who read this. I know you would read this, and you will never miss anything that I wrote here, for years. Not much, just a simple thank you to you. Hope you are doing well there and enjoy your life there. :)

Secondly, I really have so much to voice out and I would really like to take some times typing out everything that kicks into my mind. I just lost somewhere and somehow, I have too much disturb thoughts until I keep telling myself I'm lost and I don't know. But I believe that I will go back to the right track and I'm going back to the right track, or I'm already on the right track.

People told me I have been too harsh to myself. Am I? I never realise until more and more people are telling me that. I have been forcing myself not to do this and not to do that instead of acknowledge the happening. I have strong sense of responsibility until the guilt is planted in my heart when I couldn't perform what I think I should / what people expected me to perform.

I have so much dreams at night, and I guess I'm getting closer and closer to my unconscious thoughts.

What would it be.

This is a messy, unstructured updated post, really.
I will keep it update. I will.